Happy New Years

So, it's New Year's Day; 12:00 AM. People everywhere are celebrating this worldwide event at this moment (with a few countries as exceptions, like Japan for example) by drinking booze, and partying it up with either friends or family. And the I doubt it is the latter.

You know the story, it is only all to familiar.

But what should New Year's actually be about?

I suppose this day could mean different things for different people... I mean, if your idea of New Year's Eve is drinking until you puke and eating Chinese food made in America by people who don't care at all about your food and how it tastes, I suppose I must respect your opinion.

But what does this event mean to me?

Of course, I, RoXas Saix, do not believe in holidays. Why, almost every event has become corrupt with money, and commercials to BUY BUY BUY or your children will hate you. But still, I believe that these days still have a meaning, it just has been lost in the hustle and bustle of life.

That is what people like me were made for, right? To remind others about what is important.

New Years is about starting something new... and refreshing your life. Making new starts and life choices that might even change everything in your future.

This is why we make resolutions, right?

Well, even this has been corrupted, with stupid things like 'I must lose weight to look skinny like those models' or 'I must steal so-and-so's boyfriend from her'.

Is this the cruel reality we've been reduced to?

Well, it shouldn't be.

So this year, let us all make a promise. Let's promise to better ourselves, and teach one and other what it is like to work for something important again. We must promise to love... but still to hate some things, and keep the balance in the world. We must promise not to trifle over things that can't be changed. We cannot have peace without war, nor can we have good without the evil.

So instead of trying to aim for the impossible, we must first change ourselves, and learn to love what we have around us. If you are reading this blog, then chances are, you have a home. You have money, personal belongings, heat, food and companionship. And if you don't have the last choice, remember that there are always ones who love you. Gods, forgotten friends or family, and my arms are always open to anyone from any background.

I love all of you, and I hope you have a wonderful New Year filled with love. Enjoy it and embrace the things you have. Forget about the things you do not.

May all of the deities smile upon you.


I know I do.

Christmas time is almost here

I've decided to share with you a Hetalia Axis Powers fanfiction, to show you how powerful the Christmas spirit can be... even ending our animalistic characteristics for one, very meaningful day.

So please enjoy... and Happy Holidays, and a very happy (peace-filled) New Year.



'The time was during the second world war, on Christmas day.

The entire house was shaking and booming with music, and the chatter could be heard from many houses away. Most of the countries had all gathered for Christmas at America's home (even if they didn't want to, America was very persistant) for his annual Christmas get-together.
Inside, the room was full of presents.... and well, chaos, to say the least. Estonia played Christmas carols elegantly on the piano with Austia, and Finland danced around Sweden, singing along. Poland chased Lithuania arouns in his Santa lingurie, just to tease him, of course. Sealand, Hana-Tamago and Latvia sat underneath the Christmas tree, playing with their freshly un-wrapped toys. France was trying to flirt with England because he was intoxicated (which promptly started a fight between them), and America was doing his best, trying to keep peace between his guests.
He ran into the room carrying a tray full of Christmas cookies.
"Excuse me! Excuse me!" He called, pushing his way through the crowd while attempting not to drop anything.
As soon as America sat the tray down on the table, there was a loud knock at the door. America wiped his forehead.
"Who could that be? I thought that everyone was here already!" He exclaimed, not really speaking to anyone in particular.
America rushed through the other loud and obnxoius countries (almost slamming into the invisible Canada on his way), and opened the door. He gasped when he saw who it was.

"R-Russia?" America asked, staring up at the large country, "What are you doing here?"

The taller country looked away, hiding his face.
"You invited me. I thought I was an Ally."
America pouted and crossed him arms.
"I invited everyone who allied with me... but I didn't think you would have shown up." America replied coldly, not even bothering to hide his hatred for this man.
Russia looked down at him and smiled his false, childlike smile.
"I was lonely. I heard that Lithuania was here, so I've come to collect-"
"He wants to be away from you, especially on Christmas. Why don't cha give him a break, just for today?"
Russia's smile faded, and he almost looked sad.
"I didn't come to fight you, America-san. I don't want to fight with you, not today."
America glared up at him.
"Well, you should have known this would happen. We're still in battle and I'm really stressed, and I DON'T need you here to cause more problems," he growled.
Some of the countries turned to look at what was happening. Lithuania saw Russia, and his eyes narrowed. He wrapped his arms around Poland, hiding behind him. Russia looked at their hostile faces, and then lowered his face.
"It's...Christm-" He mumbled.
America's eyes widened as Russia looked at him, a tear rolling down his cheek.
"It's Christmas, can't we just STOP FIGHTING for one day?" He exclaimed.
America, and the rest of the house was silent. Snow began to fall from the sky, and some of the countries looked at each other in shame.
Russia tried to stop himself from crying, but it was so hard.
"I know we're in battle right now and all... but today is supposed to be a day or warmth and giving. Can't we all just put our foolish problems behind us for a day?"
Russia's tears fell onto the sidewalk, and America's eyes also began to water.
"I know that Germany, Italy and Japan are our enemies, and that Germany has done some mean and un-forgivable things... but for god's sake, he is not a bad person! None of them really are, so why should they be treated as animals?"
Russia began to say something more, but he was shut up as America threw his arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. Russia's cheeks went pink.
"A-America..."
America looked back up at him and smiled.
"You're right. I'm sorry for being so selfish. I should include everyone at Christmas, this isn't a time to fight."
America let go of Russia, and held out his hand. Russia stared at it for a moment, and then smiled.
For real this time.
They joined each other's hands, and decided to be friends for just one day. Afterwards, America invited all the countries that he did not include before, with warm, open arms. Germany and Prussia drank beer with England and America, all laughing and talking like civilized people. Italy flirted with Hungary (which prompted jealous from Germany, who then chased him aroudn the room). Japan stared at the giant flourecent pink Christmas cake in fear. Finally, all of the countries sat and ate Christmas dinner together, at peace for at least one day.




The following day, the fighting began again.

Sorry...

I know I had promised I would post more often.
I know I promised I'd figure out what I'd want to be, and start posting right away.

But the fact is... life... is busy.

I have been dealing with so much right now, it's been really hard to try and juggle something like a blog and my real life, so it was obvious which one I had to temporarily drop.

But now, hopefully, I am back, and you will soon understand my absence.

Ah, the lovely month of November: when the snow falls, and the walks to work seem longer and longer because of the cold air FREEZING your face off. Besides my birthday, November always seems very boring for me, considering that the snow mystically repels me, so there's no way I'm going outside.

This year, however, I found something that not only entertained me, but ate up every spare moment of my time.

NanoWrimo.
A writing contest that takes place every year in the month of November, where writers from all over the globe come together, all to reach the same goal.
What is that goal, you may ask?

Writing a 50 000 word novel in one month.

And, of course, I found out about this contest after the month had already started. I was way behind schedule, and with my birthday in this month, I knew there would be a few days where I could not write.

The goal seemed impossible.

But it probably wouldn't have been, if I would have spent less time living life, and more time writing about it. Oh well.

I ended the month at 41,629 words. I was so close, and I know that next year, I can reach that goal... nay, I can surpass that goal by 100%.

But without further ado, I will post a preview of my novel. I have mentioned my novel once before, and it has finally been finished....



''Why? Why doesn't anyone stop them?' Cario thought, beginning to cry.
Zhane took a large punch to the face, and his nose began to bleed. Cario watched the blood drip off of his face and land in the dirt with wide eyes.
"Stop it..." Cario hiccuped, without behind heard.
Cario got up from the ground, clenching his fists.
"Stop it, right now!" Cario screamed, echoing across the grounds.
Everyone was silent, as Cario ran in between the boys, arms out-stretched. Tears streamed off of his face as he spoke.
"Why? Why do you have to fight? There was never any reason for us to fight, we didn't do anything wrong!" Cario yelled.
He put his hands up to his chest, and looked at the bullies with sad eyes.
"Each and every one of us are the same, from the sadness in our eyes, to the warmth in our hearts. So why? Why must you do this?"
Zhane's eyes widened in shock. What was this boy saying?
The bullied all looked at each other in confusion. Dustin then chuckled.
"Because... it's fun. And I aint never felt my 'warm' heart." Dustin mocked, and his crew quickly laughed and nodded in agreement.
Cario looked at the ground, his hair covering his eyes.
"I see..." His words sounded sad.
Zhane's face softened, and he began to reach his hand out to the boy.
"Then you are not human enough for me to care," Cario said quietly, without emotion.
He lifted his face, his eyes still sad, but empty in some way.
"Eh!? What did you say to me?" Dustin yelled angrily.
He ran up to Cario, ready to throw him to the ground, when he was suddenly stopped by the sickening crunching noise of bones breaking. He looked down to see Cario's fist against his chest, almost smoking from the impact. Dark, crimson blood leaked from his lips, dripping slowly off of is face.
"S-shit," Dustin coughed, blood spraying across Cario's milky white skin.
He fell to the ground in pain.
"What is going on-" The Headmaster ran towards them, stopping as he saw the poor boy on the ground, coughing out his blood.
"I destroyed the bad guy." Cario said in a monotonous sing song voice, tilting his head.
He stepped on top of Dustin's elbow, crouching down.
"Can you feel the warmth of your blood now?" He asked, grabbing his wrist and pulling upward.
Dustin screamed as his bones snapped violently, his arm a twisted mess.
"Cario!" The Headmaster screamed, starting to run to break them up.
When Cario's gaze met the headmaster's, tears began to well up in his eyes and he began to sob. He ran towards the Headmaster, grabbing his arm.
"Headmaster, -hiccup-, those bad guys are fighting each other! Stop them, please!" Cario sobbed.
He turned and pointed towards the boys, who only stared back at him, frightened.
"Huh? They stopped?" Cario said, tilting his head in confusion.
Zhane stepped back, his eyes wide with fear.
'Does... he not remember?' Zhane thought, clenching his fists.'

I will not, however, be posting a full version of this story. Nay, I will finish editing and tweaking it, and send it to publisher after publisher, until I finally get what I want. Then, feel free to read it over and over again if you want. Actually, if it ever actually gets published, I may end up giving away a few copies on this blog.

I have already begun working on character and plotline development for my next year's unnamed novel. I will post some 'before the story' and 'after the story' shorts throughout the year to keep my mouth watering and my creativity a-glow, as well as drawing of the characters.
To keep you busy, I will post here a line-art that I have uploaded of one of the main characters, 'Dream-Catcher'. I will post the other characters' pictures after they have been coloured on photoshop.




So... uh... Anyways...
Before I go, I have made an account on Y!Gallery (because that now that I'm 18, I'm allowed to post my yaoi) but read the stories at your own risk. If you haven't noticed, gore is one of my favourite subjects to write about, and some of the fanfics are quite.... jaw dropping, to say the least. But they have warnings on them, of course. Some of my fics are just fluffy, so those are safe to read.

So before I begin to bore you... I bid you adieu.

I'm back (for today)

Well, I still have yet to get internet at where I live now, so it will be awhile before I post more. I'm sorry about that, but I'll share something with you in the meantime.

Sometimes, inspiration hits me out of the blue. It could be from a song, another person, or just from the way the wind blows. But to be frank, this 'talent' of mine has left me with a lot of characters I create, and then forget about in an instant. The only characters I have ever stuck with were the ones I created when I was eight and just starting my writing.

But I guess writing about new people all the time only can strengthen my writing. Anyways, let me get to a point.

I am working on a new story, called Order Araneae. No, it is not a story about spiders, but rather, spiders are used as a symbol throughout the story, and they are what sets the 'play' in motion for both of the two main characters.

The story is about two orphans boys, Cario and Zhane, coming from very different backgrounds, and yet their adventures intertwine like spiderwebs. They meet at the orphanage and become brothers by blood, calling themselves the Araneae (because of the similar dreams they have about spiders). They then seperate, Cario going to a very loving family, and Zhane being forced into living with the man who killed his 'brother's' parents, Mericose. Cario forgets his life before his family, and Zhane is forced to abandon everything he knew in order to survive his father's abuse and deciet.
Years later, Cario is a young, bullied kid in high school looking for an escape. Zhane has adopted his father's power-hungry personality, and is possessed by the webs of his nightmares. They both find demonic objects, which will either save them, or tear their souls into pieces.

Now, just in case you weren't bored enough already, I will post a small quote and a link to the first chapter.

'Cario ran from the spiders, and was embraced by an angel; with dark, dreamless eyes, and a soul as dark as the night without the moon or the stars.
The other followed them, and he became possessed by a demon carved from gold, that slowly became himself.'

http://hell-of-the-darkness.deviantart.com/#/d2zp36j

On the health of myself and others.

(Picture by talented artist Comtess-Jezebel of deviantart)

My fiancee, Mark, had to miss work today. He seems to have a severe muscle strain in his lower abdomen area, something that is not good to have when you are swinging around a sledgehammer and climbing up and down ladders. Frankly, I felt safer with him staying home from work, but he seemed to be devastated, considering how difficult it is to keep your money nowadays. Some of us just can't afford to miss too much work.

We called the hospital last night and they told us that the walk-in started at 9:00.

So there we went at 8:30, driving to the hospital, listening to the new Disturbed Cd which is... strangely relaxing for a metal album. I had a little bit of trouble pulling into the hospital, mostly because I am only a beginner and my driver teacher didn't seem to know what he was doing at all. I cursed those white lines, and cursed such an early visit to the hospital because I am not too fond of getting up earlier.

We entered the hospital and waited about ten minutes for it to open, reading posters across the walls that had really nothing to do with our medical conditions, but they were somewhat helpful anyways.

Finally, we saw the metal curtains draw back across the reception desk, and we knew it was time. My fiancee and I walked over to the desk, greeted by a very decently pretty girl with longer light brown hair and pale skin that made her look more un-healthy then some of the patients. Pretending not to have noticed her very nice, slim figure, Mark asked her in his usual, laid back tone, "Do you know when the walk-in starts?"
She replied, "Oh, sorry, that doesn't start until 5:00 P.M."

Cursing our false information, we walked back out of the hospital, into our less-than-new truck, and back home (but of course, stopping for Subways on the way).

This trip started getting me thinking about my and Mark's health, and how major it always seems to us. Mark was completely frusterated and ashamed of himself for having to miss work because of his pulled muscles. I do admit, I do over-exaggerate about my conditions at time. I have Ulcerative Colitis, a condition that can be very painful when I eat the wrong kind of food. Every time I have a flare-up, I always whine and complain about the excruciating pain that I have to go through every single day.

The truth is though, if I decided to go back on my drugs, or if I just avoided the foods that flared my stomach, I could go through every day with out experiencing that pain at all. The only problem with the second option is that I love food a little to much to give up on it. Especially McDonalds; No way am I giving up my double Big Mac meal with a large Mcflurry.


Yes, I do have other issues that keep me feeling pain most of my life, but really, who doesn't? Is there any person in this world who is granted with a life without pain? We all go through times of bad health, bad spirits and terrifying emotions. For every moment of pain we go through, it makes ours bodies just that much stronger.

Besides, we always complain about what we don't have, but what about the people that don't have anything? You get the flu and have to stay home from work, so what do you do? You lay in a nice, warm bed all day, drinking chicken noodle soup and playing video games. What happens when all those nice elements are taken away? Imagine feeling the same amount of sickness, but without a bed, without any food, medicine or someone to tell you that, "Everything is going to be alright."



It's amazing how much we complain about, and overlook those little things in life that keep us alive.

Really, all I want people to take away from this blog is that we people, who are sitting at the computer, writing on our blogs (and sipping on hot chocolate) have a lot in life to be happy for. So the next time you're sick in bed, dwelling on how terrible you feel and how much money you'll lose from missing work, start listing off the things you do have, not the things you don't.

(Picture by the talented mjjones of deviantart)

Welcome To Wonderland

Well, I'm not usually one for this 'blogging', or whatever you'd like to call it, but my sister has a blog and I want to keep in touch with her.

So, I'll give it a try.

I'm not quite sure what I can blog about.

I like make-up, but to be frank, I'm not very intelligent in that type of area. I do wear make-up every day, but the only real make-up 'tricks' I know is how to make yourself look like a child and how to make yourself look like an anime character.

I do love to cosplay, but then again, I'm only an ametuer for that as well. I know how to throw together a costume of my favourite characters. I know how to act exactly like the character I'm cosplaying as, as well as what part in a skit would suit my character best.

Me, cosplaying as my Death Note OC Jonas.

My problem is that I cosplay alone because I come from a smaller, un-educated town that doesn't know enough about anime to tell the two Italy's apart or name at least five anime characters off the top of their head. In this day of age, most people have heard at least of Naruto and Bleach. The people in this town probably couldn't even tell you what 'Hello Kitty' was.

In case you're wondering, North Italy is the happy one.

I do love to roleplay and write books, and I'm pretty darn good at it too. The problem with that is that posting artworks and poetry on your blog makes you seem like some emo kid who is just trying to fit in with the fads.

Yes, I do write poetry, but I'm more into roleplaying at the moment. I create a character of my own, think up a backstory, draw up some poses and voila: It's ready for gaiaonline. It's a little bit frusterating trying to roleplay online though, considering that most of the people on that site are high school students, and I start work when everyone else is going home. I guess that's the price we must pay to make money, right?

So, really, I guess all I want to say is that my blog isn't a daily blog, or a make-up blog, or something some teenager just created for 'followers'. My blog is something I created for fun; something to document the short about of time that I have to live in. No matter who we are, and where we come from, we all have something we have in common: We are all running out of time on this broken down planet we come home. I'm pretty sure that most of us are also out there to enjoy it.

So sit back, relax, and take a look into the Wonderland that I have created for the world to see: The wonderful story of life, and everything and everyone who is enjoying it.

Picture done by LanWu of deviantart.